~WHEN WE WE HAVE PEACE?~

 

 

 

 

 

Today is September 11th, a day like all Americans I also remember the needless  end to the 3,000 souls that took place seven years ago.   It is also a day I feel profound sadness that I've to been witness to some (3 out of 4) of the greatest advocators of peace of all time that were assassinated  for their inspirational words & strife for world peace. It is 60 yrs after Ghandi was assassinated, about 45 yrs after MLK and JFK, and 28 yrs after John Lennon and we at still at war.  

 

 

Unfortunately, I can't defend the decisions of our President.  So much information is "Classified".  It is my opinion that our special forces units such as the green berets and the navy seals should be able to find Osama bin Laden & disban al-Qa'ida.   But, I do know that I won't wish death on any other human being.  Yes, terrorism should be put to an end.  But, doesn't violence beget violence?

Shouldn't peace beget peace?

If our country is so great shouldn't we "Lead by example"

 

 

 

 

 

This is a beautiful tribute found at Teresa's Journal-Remembering to Exhale 

 

 

 

 

 

I happened to be camping in Canada at the time and didn't have access to a TV for a few days.  The attitude of the Canadian people astounded me! They actually believe "Americans deserve what happened". And Americans are so " arrogant"!  'We' (Americans) believe we can police the world, cause war, and install chosen leaders in whatever country we want".   The destruction was right in front of their eyes and yet, the people around me truly believed those innocent people "deserved it".

 

You all know I do not use my journal as a political, religious platform or a soapbox.  I am saying what I feel here, now, today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

~Ike~

We've been getting wind gusts up to 30 mph and rain off & on from Hurricane Ike. Key West has evacuated for the 3rd time in 6 weeks. So many watch where the EYE is and don't realize that these hurricanes are 100-200-300 or in the case of Ike~ 900 miles wide. He's a biggin'. I sure hope the people in Texas evacutate because by the time he crosses the Gulf he's going to be one big monster. I've noticed that when my weather widget is done on my sidebar, it when a tropical storm or hurricane is in the area. Geezzz, just when I need the Doppler radar I can't get it.

I've been on the west coast of Florida for 15 years not, and although I am fairly used to things getting churned up this time of year, it's still a real pain in the tush! But, like I told y'all last winter....looks like paradise here in the winter, but we pay our price in the summer and fall.








So I have 2 reasons to really want to be in New York this time of year. One to ditch the Tropical storms. The other to see the season change into vivid colors of orange, red, yellow against the backdrop of the blue sky and green evergreens.


And I do miss the small town of Scotia where my grandparents lived & whom I felt safe with, but I actually lived there for the 6 years I was in Jr High & High School. Then stayed in New York for college. I miss lakes without alligators, I miss apples that are crisp and fresh, the smell of a wood burning fire on a crisp morning with the smell of baking bread.


Oh, September 11th, is my blogiversary! I am one year old.

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~Saving Kitten Bucks~

            Little Miss Mau'i had her immunizations today. When I was checking out Doggie Diet Food for Jazzy last month at Dog Lover's  Pet Store, I picked up a Flyer for a reduced price on Cat immunization's. At the Cat Hospital an office visit and immunization's cost over $130.00.  At Dog Lover's today a Vet saw her, gave the deworming medicine & all the immunizations except Rabies, which she had when she was spayed.  All for $38.00. I am feeling mighty Smug right now!    Would you believe Mau'i  is 6 months old now? She still goes in her crate at 11 pm.  Wakes up about 7am.  I get her a bowl of water and push her skinny little kitty butt out the door.   She must find bugs a & enough  lizards to keep her amused until 11 am,  She comes in, eats her Kitty Kibble & sleeps until 5 pm.  Then out she goes until 10 pm.    She sounds like a Diva already doesn't she?    

~The Head of the Matter or Part 3~

 

 

 

 

 

 

WARNING: NOT DRAMA FREE!

 

 

This is where things come to a "Head" 

 

After reading my previous 2 entries you know I went out with Mr A, who had a 4 yr old daughter last winter.  Stopped seeing him mainly because he had an obvious drinking problem.  Sue, along with other people in the Park are not only acting like I don't exist, but like I had a contagious disease.

 

 

 

 

One day shortly after noon I walked down to the front of the Park to visit Sue at her place during her lunch break from her office duties.  Still thinking that her moodiness is attributed to a little depression or family problems, I am trying to be a concerned, yet an upbeat friend.  After a few minutes she pushed herself up in her chair and away from me and said, "Bethe, I need to ask you something". 

"Sure, anything"

"Did you report A to the Department of Child  Family Services?"

"Of course not",  I said & asked why.

 

She then went onto tell me that she felt like she could tell me about it now because A was moving out of the Park and it was all my fault.  Apparently, someone reported him to DCF and S said that she was angry because they should up on her doorstep one day asking her questions about his drinking.  She then went on to say that I had told her that I was going to report him.  Which was entirely not true, because I never had a thought of doing that.  Besides I know that the drinking alone isn't a reason to deny visitation.

 

I had talked with S during one of our shopping trips that I was surprised that the school the 4 1/2 yr old goes to doesn't question why the child is still in diapers.  I even asked him one day if Miss H ever resisted the idea of diapers.  He said "No" & that he couldn't do anything about it because he didn't have any cooperation on the mother's side.  I had been witness to her asking to go to the restroom when the 3 of us were out one day and A told her to "go pee" in her diaper.

 

 

Now I have had all the Child abuse and Neglect courses that nurses and Dr's have to take.  There wasn't really anything to report.  And having four years of Child Psych in college, I know that as soon as Miss H's classmate's call her attention to the fact she is wearing diapers she will potty train herself.  Peer pressure. 

 

When I told S "no". She balked at me and said that everyone in the Park knows I did.  So here is someone whom I considered a very good friend not believing me.  She told me not to bother talking to Mr A about it because he wouldn't believe me.  Knowing enough about him, he does blame everyone around him for his misery.  Workman's comp for taking pictures and video, work for setting him up to carry heavy things so WC could video him, his Ex wife, his Dr's, the "Snoop Sister's" & "HillBilly Bobby" who razzed him about going out with me.  He felt in February that people in the Park  watched him. 

So why not blame me for his misery, too??

 

 

 

That night I thought about it.  It occurred to me that Mr A was questioned by DCF.  He then talked with  Glenda (a drinking buddy), and Glenda told S.  And S believed it because it sounded like something I had told her.  Well, it did because it came from Mr A's mouth.

 

Needless to say my innards were in a twist I was so upset about this fallacy.  Upset that this effected my friendship with S.  The next day I went down and talked with her and told her how upset I was. When I wen to sit down she reached over and closed her laptop.  She knows I keep a journal and I think she was trying to find it online.  I read my entries from back in January and February and never did I mention anything about reporting the man to DCF.  She seemed cold and despite my protests to the accusations my word's rolled off her like rain off a duck.

 

I did see Mr A driving by a few times, moving his things I suppose.  I heard later that he had sold his small trailer.  He waved to me during one of his passes.

 

The following weekend I talked with my son about all this. And even considered moving myself because of the tension.  I couldn't eat or drink, I couldn't;t sleep.  While Marc & I were talking he said to me that men handle things differently than women.  What he would do is go to the source & ask why they were talking smack about him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A few weeks went by before I happened to see Mr A here at the Park visiting.  I called out to him.  He kept walking as if he hadn't heard me.  I caught up to him as he wen to pull out of the parking lot.  I said few words.  Only that it wasn't me and that it was someone else in his life & that I wanted him to be aware of that for the future.   I never wished any thing bad to happen to the man. 

 

The next day I saw Glenda cleaning her car as I was walking Jazzy.  She was the one who I particularly channeled bad thoughts.  I hated to approach her in the worst way.  She is a rather "tough little cookie" and if anyone could rip my face off it would be her.  And I am just not the sort to confront.  I did though, I walked over to her SUV & asked if I could talk with her, then asked if there was something bothering her.  She said yes, and that she was really "pissed off" at me.  I told her that I had sensed that, but had been clueless as to why.  She talked, I listened.  I told her that S had told me that A thought I reported him to DCF  and that I had talked with Mr A & told him it wasn't me.  She & I actually had a good talk, her body language relaxed,  and after 15-20 minutes she actually said she was going to talk with A.   I asked her if "we were good" and she said, "yes".   I left feeling a whole lot better about that.

 

 

 

 

 

Things are still strained between S and I.  I don't go down to the office except to collect my mail or pay the rent.  She is polite and cool.

 

Bill came over last weekend to help move the deck along with Glenda's roommate and a couple of guys from across the street. Bill said that she is still depressed and doesn't feel like being around anyone.  Just to give her time.

 

Last winter when HillBilly Bobby was on my ass about this & that & everything, S had just asked me to "be good" because it ultimately came back on her.  He would go to her & tell her "You've got to talk with Bethe!".   I understood.  For months, maybe up to 18 months, there were 2 places I would be.  Home in my little place or with S.  I do have a problem with trusting her now.  How can I talk to a "best friend" knowing down the line she may twist my words & turn things against me?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So there's the "Head" of the problem  The blemish on my reputation.   I am doing OK.  Taking the bus instead of shopping with S.  And in this heat it really takes it's toll.  I've lost nearly 15 lbs between the heat & the stress.  Yes, I am one of those people who can't eat when stressed out. 

 

Now that I am feeling better about things, and it's taken a good month. So no worries there.   I will probably start journaling again. I know a few of you noticed that I changed the names of the people.  I just thought it would be a good idea since S has probably found this journal by now. 

 

So that is that.  Thank you for reading all this.  I guess I needed to get this writtenbefore I could go on.

 

 

 

 

Thank you for the graphics Winivere!

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~Inflammation-Part 2~

    

 

 

My good friend Sue and her hubby's anniversary was the end of June and I told her I'd like to fix them dinner.  Something simple...chicken, dumplings, candied carrots and salad.  Nothing special.  Just something nice so she didn't have to think about fixing dinner after work that day.  Intuition told me she really didn't want me to.

She had an odd cool tone when she told me that I didn't have to.  She repeated this several times over the weeknd and was unusally quiet during dinner.  She talked about depression an dhow she gets in a low place that she can't ig herself out of.

 

Then when I offered to wash her little car for her one day, again she told me I didn't really didn't have to.  She has taken me for appointments and here and there and I had been promising to do it for a long time.  I finally felt really good one day& I knew I could finish the job once I started. Besides she and I go everywhere.  It womething I could do since she doesn't allow me to pay for gas.  I got this "feeling" that she didn't want me to.  I mean really bad vibes coming my way and I had no idea where they were coming from or why I was feeling this cool aura.  I was giving of myself, and my little efforts seemed to be hitting a block of ice. 

 

 

Other things were happening around me.  I would be down in the Park Office and when woman Glenda would come in, she wouldn't look at me or say Hello after I greeter her as she always had before.  I even mentioned to Sue that it seemed like Glenda was ignoring me.  This happened 3-4  times.  "Weird", I thought, & shrugged it off.

 

Then July 4th there was a picnic/pool party here in the Park.  I was helping Sue clean up afterwards, doing dishes, wiping down tables, putting food away.  As we were working another woman in the park was telling Sandy how her b/f's band was offered a job playing at a local restaurant.  I had mentioned that I'd love to hear them.  A bit later Inge, the assistant office manager, came in. Sandy and Inge made plans for the 2 of them and their husbands to go to hear the band.  Am I getting it yet??  Nope, dense I am!  I'm thinking...Okay married peeps want to hang around married peeps.

 

*It's something you live with when you are a single woman. 

 

Sometime later I did ask Sue if there was something I did to upset her.  She said no, she just had a lot on her mind (the family problems).   I even asked Sue's husband when I was walking Jazzy one day, if there was something I did.  Sue seemed angry.   He said "no" and the that sometimes she gets that way.  The best thing to do is just let her have her space.

 

 

My thoughts were that maybe she felt that along with her family problems and managerial duties here in the Park that I was an added responsibility. 

So I didn't hang around as much.  She didn't seem to have much to say to me anyway and there's only so much cheerfulness that I can spew.  But,  I tried to carry on as normal.  Trying to be a bit cheery for Sandy, and I didn't asked for any rides to the grocery store or Dr's appt's.  Until that day Jasmine was so sick.   I had to get her to the Vet and I had not way to get there. 

~Jazzy is so sick~

 

 

Taxi, yes, but the Vet's office said that I'd have to be there within a half hour.  After making several calls to my usual drivers and they couldn't come. I called Sue. She said she'd come -  I waited, waited, waited.  And the time was getting close.  One of my neighbors was leaving for work.  I asked her if she was going south.  She was and I asked if we could get a ride.  I called Sandy, told her that neighbor lady was giving us a ride.  "Well, I'm on my way!", she said. As I am on the phone with her we drive past Sue's parked car.  Hmm,  me thinks, "doesn't 'on my way' mean you are en route?"   She did say that if I need a ride home to call and if her grandson and her hadn't left for the water park yet, she'd come get us.

 

Now that day I had a Dr's appt that had been made a month before. Sue had said she could give me a ride or if she & her daughter had plans I could use her car.  sue's daughter wasn't here, but I found out when she picked Jazzy & I up at the Vet that they planned to go to the water park that morning.   That was okay I had canceled the appt anyway as  Jazzy was too sick and as you all know the visit with the Vet visit didn't go so well.  But I know she hadn't forgotten the date of my appt.  She remembers those things.

 

Do I get it yet??

Nope, not a clue!

~The Big Red Bump-Part 1~

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know I mentioned in a previous entry that things in the Park are slow.  It's summer in the south and besides the threats of storms the mood is low key and lazy.

 

 

Until one gets a ZIT.  A blemish the becomes a boil.

I guess I finally feel somewhat comfort talking about this now and it will probably end up being a 2 or 3 "part-er".

 

Remember way back in December, January, and February when I was seeing the "Adam"?

 

 

Remember the incident when he asked me to stay with Heather while he went to the store?  And when he got back he was talking to me about some things that were upsetting him about his workman's comp, lawyers and work.  He welled up with tears and reached under the sink and pulled out a bottle-whiskey or scotch from the size & shape of the bottle.  Then literally cried on my shoulder telling me it wasn't me, it was him.....

 

Entry ~They always come back~

 

 

Then one day wewere sitting on the porch.  A glass in hand "Adam" again was telling me how he was getting screwed by Workman's Comp.  His voice getting louder and louder from the brown liquid in his glass.  Remember I told Art he was only adding to his problems by drinking.  And the liquor was not going to solve his problems?  I said my piece.  That was that.  We even went out a couple times afterwards because Heather wanted me to come along.

 

Entry - Brutal or Brutally Honest??

 

 

Well, life went on.  He went his way, I went mine.  I'd see him or Heather around the RV Park, wave "Hello" or take Jazzy over to Heather so she could pet her.  I did notice that when I did stop to talk "Adam" would never look me in the eye.

 

Ehhhh ~ no worries, right??

 

 

OLYMPICS~THE END

 

 

 

I can't believe the summer Olympics is over.  My hope it is that they will find that the controversy over the age of the Chinese Women's Gymnastics team is resolved.  Of course by the time is it, the U.S. women would have lost their golden moment in the sun. 

 

I can't believe it is still raining.  Fay, Fay go away! Fay has been to the south of us, the east of us, and the north.  We've had 2-3 inches a day last Sunday.  Those feeder bands blowing through every couple of hours is sure getting tedious.  It's raining with sharp thunder right now.  I was able to take the tarps off my outdoor furniture to let the patio dry for a couple of hours.

 

I can't believe my next door neighbor left Tennessee & drove thru Fay to come to Florida to take her 5th wheel back there.  She wants to sell it & wants $30,000 for it.  It's the best set up I've ever seen, but the market has dropped out of the RV business.  She is giving me her wooden deck. The one her son who is in construction built.  And it IS built to last 100 yrs!   Now I have to figure out how to move it.  I think I'll have to partially dissemble it.  Totally, if i cant round up a few good men to help move it.   I can work a drill to remove the screws then move the planks of wood over to my lot one by one.  I'll have my Sharpie handy to number each piece to reassemble.   One think is for sure.  I have to have it done before HillBilly Bobby (the RV Park Grounds manager) gets back from Kentucky.  He'd tell me it won't fit my lot just so he can take it and sell it.  As he has done with so many others.

 

Took a break from writing this entry  to take Neighbor Nancy's 4yr old great grandson and their 12 week old Bull Mastiff puppy for a walk around the block after the shower.  Ugh!  We got caught in another down pour.  Lightening, thunder, drenching rain.  We had to run to get back to the RV's.

 

Bull Dozer, the Bull Mastiff puppy is 12 weeks old, 25 solid pounds & a head taller than Jazzy.  He wanted to play and poor Jazz tried to let him know with nip that she was just not going to put up with his roughness.  Of course, he thought it was all a game and lots of fun!

 

 

BLINKY THEMES THIS WEEK

 

BUTTERFLIES~  

 

      

 

  

 

 

 

DOGS~

 

 

 

Tags: 2008 Olymics tag, Butterfly Blinkies, Dog Blinkies